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Tuesday, September 29, 2009

Stupid Questions

Why is an alarm clock going "off" when it
actually turns on?


If you mated a bull dog and a shitsu, would it be called
a bullshit?


If an ambulance is on its way to save someone, and it
runs someone over, does it stop to help them?


Why is Grape Nuts cereal called that, when it contains
neither grapes, nor nuts?


If Jimmy cracks corn and no one cares, why is there
a song about him?


Why is it called a "drive through" if you
have to stop?


Why does mineral water that has "trickled through
mountains for centuries" go out of date next year?


Why are Softballs hard?


Do the minutes on the movie boxes include the previews,
credits, and special features, or just the movie itself?


If the professor on Giligan's Island can make a radio
out of coconut, why can't he fix a hole in a boat?


Why do people point to their wrist when asking for the
time, but people don't point to their crotch when they ask where the
bathroom is?


Why is an electrical outlet called an outlet when you
plug things into it? Shouldn't it be called an inlet.


Why do we scrub Down and wash Up?


Why does Goofy stand erect while Pluto remains on all
fours? They're both dogs!


Can blind people see their dreams?


Why do most cars have speedometers that go up to at
least 130 when you legally can't go that fast on any road?


Why do they call it "getting your dog fixed" if afterwards it doesn't work anymore?


Why do they call it taking a dump? Shouldn't it be leaving
a dump?


Where in the nursery rhyme does it say humpty dumpty
is an egg?


Why do they sterilize needles for lethal injections?


Why do banks leave the door wide open but the pens chained
to the counter?


If electricity comes from electrons, does morality come
from morons?


Why does Donald Duck wear a towel when he comes out
of the shower, when he doesn't usually wear any pants?


How come you press harder on a remote control when you
know the battery is dead?


If an orange is orange, why isn't a lime called a green
or a lemon called a yellow?


If a cat always lands on its feet, and buttered bread
always lands butter side down, what would happen if you tied buttered
bread on top of a cat?


If the #2 pencil is the most popular, why's it still
#2?


What color would a smurf turn if you choked it?


Where's the egg in an egg roll?


Why aren't blue berries blue?


Where is the lead in a lead pencil?


Why is Greenland called green when it is covered in
ice?


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